Parents and relatives come in priority over the in-laws

11-9-2012 | IslamWeb

Question:

Are parents-in-law to be accorded more respect/love/honor than own parents? Are in-laws' more important than own blood relatives like cousins, uncles, aunts, etc??

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

There is no doubt that the status of parents is not rivaled by the status of any other people, be it the status of the in-laws or that of relatives; indeed, we have already clarified the greatness of the status of parents in Fataawa 84942, 87019 and 82254.

Hence, it is an obligation to be kind and dutiful to one’s own parents, but it is not an obligation in regard to the parents of a person’s wife. However, being kind to the parents of a person’s wife is something required in general.

Moreover, the blood relatives and other relatives come in priority over the in-laws. Indeed, Allaah mentioned their right in the Quran directly after mentioning the right of the parents; Allaah Says (what means): {Worship Allaah and associate nothing with Him and to parents do good, and to relatives,…}[Quran 4:36]

Finally, the following two matters should be mentioned:

1- As a general rule, and it is also something Islamically required, affection and love should prevail between the Muslims, and they should be at their best in regard to fulfilling the meaning of Islamic brotherhood.

2- The person is not held accountable for the actions of the heart which he has no control over, like being emotionally inclined to someone, and the like. It is for this reason that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "O Allaah! This is my division in what I own, so do not blame me in what you own and I don’t own (referring to his heart).” [Abu Daawood and At-Tirmithi - As-Suyooti graded it as Saheeh (sound)] Besides, Allaah Says (what means): {Allaah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity.}[Quran 2:286]

Allaah Knows best.

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