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His Parents Prevented Him from Marrying a Woman because She Is from another Country

Question

Asalamu Alaikum. I have a dilemma where i married a muslimah without telling my parents because they don’t want me to marry her simply because she is not from my country. I tried for the past yesr to convince my parents that they should let me, but even my siblings told me bluntly that they will never agree because that want me to marry only from my country. I fear fitna and temptation, which is why i married her. I prayed Istikhaarah twice before I married her, so this is Allah’s will I believe, and may Allah guide me and may Allah grant me my parents’ satisfaction and approval. However I want to know, am I wrong for doing this? Will Allah angry at me when they get angry at me for this when I tell them or will Allah forgive me? I did this sincerely to abstain from haram. Also any tips on how I should tell them in shaa Allah in the future? Jazakum Allahu Khairan.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

If this woman is religiously committed and has a good moral character, then your parents or others should not have prevented you from marrying her merely because she is from another country as this is not an impediment that prevents you from marrying her.

You did well by trying to convince them. The basic principle is that you should not marry without the consent of your parents because obeying them is a religious obligation, whereas your marriage to this woman is not obligatory on you. However, if the situation is as you mentioned in the question, i.e. you married her out of your fear to fall into temptation, then there is no blame on you for that because obedience to one’s parents is required only in what is good and permissible. This does not apply to obeying them in what may lead to disobeying Allah, The Exalted.

You should choose a suitable time to inform them of this matter, and you may seek the help of someone whom they hold in high regard to do this on your behalf. If they get angry with you, you should strive to gain their pleasure and supplicate Allah, The Exalted, diligently to make this easy for you.

For more benefit on the limits of obedience to parents, please refer to Fataawa 271255 and 123554.

Allah Knows best.

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