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Fatwa CenterHis Wife and In-Laws Cause Him Depression
Question
As Salam O Allay kum, Sir I am married from the past 8 years and once I get married I was penny less guy and at that time my in-laws was looking at my physical appearance and breed they are rich they don't respect me not even mother in law but few brother and sister in law also, once she send me back from her home without lunch and I was far from my home around 150km and my wife stay there with them..there are so many incidents and these incidents are affecting my life physically and financially as well because my wife always support and love her family even she said as I like you I like my parents and family the same these things can't let me sleep..I am very disturbed .I am not rich does all these things matter.i try to follow Islam and do business accordingly and I doing the wrong things, didn't hurt anyone I swear to Allah but sir I can't feel like living I m very depressed we are Khan's if money is lost nothing is lost if respect is lost everything is lost.. suicide is Haram otherwise I did that a long time ago...my wife always buttering her family and expect me to do the same..how can I forget I try to forget but I can't forget how they disrespect me in front of her maids... please tell me the solution accordingly...I am writing here to get the solution because I don't want to suffer more please help me out and please tell me what to recite for suqoon e qalb...Ja Zak Allah khair
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we ask Allah Almighty to facilitate your affairs, and relieve your distress and sorrow, as He is All-Hearing and He answers the supplications.
We first recommend you to take it easy and not to grieve or be depressed as this may lead to unpleasant consequences.
You should supplicate Allah especially with the supplications that cause relief from anxiety and sorrow. The Prophet said: "The supplication of the distressed is 'Allahumma rahmataka arju fala takilni ila nafsi tarfata 'ayn, wa aslih li sha'ni kullahu, laa ilaaha illa anta.' (O Allah, it is Your Mercy that I hope for, so do not leave me in charge of my affairs even for a blink of an eye and rectify for me all of my affairs. None has the right to be worshiped except You)." [Abu Daawood]
You should also mention Allah with the mention that relieves your mind and makes you feel at ease. Allah Says (what means): {Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured."} [Quran 13:28]
If your in-laws do not respect you and they look at you with contempt for material considerations, then they are wrong. Affection and love should prevail between the people who are related by marriage and between in-laws. If they maintain bad relations with you, then just ignore them and do not care about them, because sometimes leaving them is a reason for having a rest; and enjoy yourself by keeping company with righteous people so that they would help and support you.
The fact that your wife loves her family in the same manner that she loves you is not a problem, so you should not worry about this. Even if she loves her family more than she loves you, then this is normal.
Most importantly, she has to fulfill your rights as a husband, and she should obey you in reasonable terms in matters in which she is obliged to obey you.
We did not understand exactly what you meant by saying: "She sent me back from her home without lunch and I was far from my home about 150 km, and my wife stayed there with them”; in general; however, we say that a wife must serve her husband according to what is customary, among which is preparing food for him.
If the wife does not obey her husband then she is rebellious, so her husband should rectify her. Then, if she becomes righteous, this is what is required; otherwise, he should not torture himself because of her. He should consider separating from her if this is better for him.
As you mentioned, committing suicide is forbidden, and it is a grave major sin. A rational man would not commit it, let alone a believer. Indeed, you did well as you did not commit suicide. The matter does not deserve to commit suicide because of that. This is because suicide is a transition to a greater misery, and the doer will regret when it is too late.
Allah knows best.
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